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I love to plan. Not because I’m type A (more like B+), but because I love to know where I am going so that little anxious part inside of me can take comfort. At least I made a plan, I’ll think. Even if it goes awry. At least I wasn’t caught unawares. At least I had some chance to brace myself for it, whatever it it may be. Babies and birthing are one of those mysterious areas of life where preparing and planning, while crucial for informing our reactions, are somewhat negligible. I firmly believe in taking a childbirth education class, unless you were raised around midwives and picked up on birth stuff. Most of us never have had any exposure to anything remotely birthy beyond a “rush to the hospital, scream, and push” scene in a movie. I’m a big believer in doulas, a hired labor support person above and beyond your partner. I’m a big believer in writing out a birth plan, reading as much as you can, watching documentaries, and asking women about their births. Yet. And yet. All that planning and preparing and honing your instincts and setting your expectations to a much lower dial doesn’t mean things will go as you ever imagined them. So while I sit here, 39 weeks pregnant, in deep anticipation of this coming labor, I still have to tell myself that ultimately, I’m not in control. I’m just not. My capable midwife, the nursing staff, the surgeons if I need…
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Our 102 year old house has two closets in the master//owner’s suite. One for the lady of the house complete with a sit-down-built-in-vanity-do-your-make-up and one for the gentleman to hang his suits. You can guess how often I sit to do my makeup at any vanity. It occurred to me that this dressing room wasn’t well suited even if I was able to fit all my clothing in there. And it occurred to me that although we co-sleep for a long time, this baby girl was going to need somewhere to be stashed for naps once she’s at that 6 month marker and needs more than sleeping in the sling. So I pinched my husband and dad into demo’ing it. And then a friend helped sheet rock & fit it with baseboards and the like. Then we had carpeting put in. Then this same handy friend made shelves after I had Shea and my sister Katie over to give me design input, and facetimed a million times with my mom & Molly in New York. Tah-dah. I give you: a new fav room in the house! The kids love to destroy it on a daily basis–I mean, help me make it cosy for her. Vase & Lights // Target boutique Doll // Dancy Pants Disco Dried flowers // party a year ago Yes, it looks like a dorm room. I think there’s a fine line between nursery decor & dorm room these days. George original prints // my sister, Katie!…
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Thanksgiving before I ate a bunch of pie. And why is that shovel out? Clearly we’ve had very little snow in Minnesota so far! In fact, everything feels scattered these days. My mind, my hair, my ability to function. Hyperemesis is hanging on strong through week 37 and even despite my many and best efforts to reframe it in my mind and reaccept being sick and laying down, it gets the better of me some days. I feel frustration for my husband, for my children, for my sainted family that’s so helpful. I feel guilty that I can’t function as I’d like. End of pregnancy is hard for everyone, I know! It’s just a wrapping up of nine month of growing and thinking and preparing. How special for me it comes parallel to the birth of Christ! I wish I could say this has been the pregnancy where I’ve experienced real, true patience and made time for lots of prayer, and offered up my suffering, and also stayed in yoga-ready-to-birth shape. Every pregnancy I have such high hopes! And then am laid low by the realities of how my body experiences pregnancy. This is the first time for sciatic nerve pain, though, and I must say, yowzer for my friends who suffer it regularly. These prayers I’m offering for you! I’m ready for baby girl to come anytime, but also don’t feel anxious. If she isn’t here by 41 weeks, my superb midwife and I will talk induction options (not…
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It’s gift season! I love giving and receiving gifts so very very much so the delights of the season are not lost on me. I asked around to all my creative hand making friends for a little coupon code for you from their shoppes. They were so generous to oblige!! So I’ve broken it down by genre to make it a little easier for you to scan through and make your selection. Supporting small businesses means that they really truly benefit from your purchase. Like, it can actually help them with their own holiday budget for their family & friends! So thank you for shopping small. Household Clean and Simple: I received the laundry soap & dish soap and absolutely love both of them. She does such a beautiful job on clean ingredients and recipes–a total mystery to me how one figures these things out. My dry itchy skinned children said their clothing felt “really good” after the washings and the dishwasher dishes smelled clean without that awful chemical smell! A big fan over here! WHOLEHOLIDAY for 25% off. Call Her Happy: embroidered wearable art, watercolors, and liturgical living guide. Jenna offers how to practice liturgical living with your small children in a VERY doable way. Talk about a happier household! I’m really looking forward to implementing her suggestions throughout Advent. (I love her hoop art, too, by the way, and her Anxiety book, so you can’t go wrong with anything from her shoppe!) Code: WHOLEPARENTLL for $3 off! Faberie: I love their washcloths…
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Well, maybe flunked is a harsh term, but I am definitely a drop-out homeschooling mama! When we decided to enroll our oldest in first grade at our local Catholic school a year before he actually went, I was flooded || plagued || haunted by feelings of guilt. Even as the two oldest still get to romp//play//fight out at the Lodge on weekends. Maybe you’ve struggled with this decision, too. Hopefully you’ve had the space and time to evaluate and figure out what’s best for your family without feeling judged by yourself or others. Guilt that being an educated at home mom meant I shouldn’t need to rely on other educators. Guilt that tuition is, well, it’s not free, and I’m not working (see point one). Guilt that I don’t have ample energy to provide my eager little learners with enriching educational experiences on a regular basis. Guilt that I was eeking out of some etherial duty that Catholic moms have of home-educating their children. I also went from being a virulent I can totally homeschool let’s do this forever! when I had a three year old and a one year old to okay! more workbooks and audio stories on your own while I take care of the baby with three kids in four years and then this past year I can’t leave the house much because I’m throwing up and you want to do another science experiment thank GOD you’re going to school in the fall. The kicker for us was that pregnancy is so debilitating with…
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You’re thinking, yes, yes, you’ve talked about this before. But I have short-term mom brain so really all I can fixate on is this pregnancy and how I’m surviving. 33 weeks, baby. And considering that my midwife & I agree to not go 42 weeks (like last time–10 pounder), that means I will only be pregnant for 7-8 more weeks. WE CAN DO THIS. Yes, the throwing up continues as does varicose crippling pain, as does all the unmentionables (are there any left?) of pregnancy, but I’m so damn grateful for this baby girl that I just am coasting through the finish line. And this is how I’m surviving: 1) Blessed Nest Pillow. My sister gave me one with my second? third? pregnancy for nursing, but it’s also the only thing I can sleep with that comfortably supports my belly and my back and helps prop me up with insane heartburn that’s like a firehose. 2) Bumble Balm. They’re cracked all the time from breathing in & out of my mouth. And frankly, they retain chocolate from my afternoon mint chocolate ice cream, which is an inexcusable tell-tale sign of raiding the freezer. So here it is: my sister’s amazing organic balm collection! 3) Sheepskin slippers. My house is old and cold already. And I live in a version of theses for my toesies. Like, all the time. They make my swollen feet feel better. 4) Sea Salt. Straight up sea salt from the Dead Sea. I feel so much…
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