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We enjoyed such a magical weekend: trips to the River, a little friend’s birthday party, a sweet and peaceful afternoon family nap, glorious weather, and lots of good food. But what about those weekends when your partner is working? Or you’re working? Or your child is tantrum-city? We’ve had our fair share of those kinds of weekends too. With a 21 month old, and a 35 week pregnant mama, here are a few things that have helped AA and I support each other, even while each of us is in dire need of a break. 1) Let go of all non-essential activities. For us, I’m the majority time-with-kiddo-parent. That means the few hours AA sees J at night, and those precious weekends, are truly gem times for them. I try to be sensitive in planning non-immediate family activities to ensure they don’t encroach on the boys’ time together. If it’s something we can all do together happily (e.g., NOT running errands as that’s not generally J’s forte), then I’ll go ahead and plan it in. If it’s an adult only activity, or one that requires not paying much attention to J, we try to keep those to later evenings when he’s asleep. Does that mean that once you have children you are totally boring? Yeah, probably. 2) Don’t keep score of who’s doing more. So long as you have a balanced relationship with your partner wherein you know he or she is giving the proverbial “all”–try not to keep score.…
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This is part 8 of our Birth & Parenting Series. Part 1 (Thoughts From a Mother of Four) is here, part 2 (Mother of Seven Shares Her Empowering Birth Stories) is here, part 3 (First-Time Mother of Twins) is here, part 4 (How First-Time Parents Braved a Placental Abruption) is here, part 5 (Childbirth Collective Doula Film Premiere) is here, part 6 (First-Time Mama Bravely Faces Transverse Baby & C-Section) is here, and part 7 (Homeschooling Mama Shares Her Path to Schooling) is here. For the first time, we have the privilege of hearing about birth from the father’s perspective. This dad helped his wife welcome their little girl into the world at a local birth center. His story shows how crucial partnership and support are through this beautiful and difficult process of birth. Amazing parents! Amazing support from the birth center. And a beautiful little girl at the end of it all. This article was first printed on the website, Family Dinner. Our baby, Vera, was born on December 28th, 2010 at the Morning Star Birth Center in St Louis Park, Minnesota. It was by far the most profound and amazing experience of my life; I now understand purpose, responsibility, and meaning in ways I never knew possible! Since becoming a father I’ve had a number of thoughts I’d like to express on the subject of birth centers, Morning Star Birth Center, the midwives who work there, and the whole concept of an out-of-hospital birth. To be honest I didn’t know what to expect when my wife suggested…
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Gardening is one of those wonderful family activities we love to do. It teaches J about stewardship, caring for the food we eat, having fun in the dirt, and doing something productive and delightful with us. Talk about nourishing the whole person of the child! I remember when he was still an infant and in the sling and I was out weeding two summers ago. It was heavenly. And then last summer he would wobble around in the tomato patch and try to put things into his mouth that didn’t belong there (i.e., sticks, compost, etc). Even if you don’t have a backyard, you can still do a considerable amount of gardening if you have a windowsill or even little terrace. Fresh herbs? Yes, please, thank you! And compost? The best thing to do with your kitchen scraps: grow fertilizer & reduce your garbage can waste. 1) Last year’s garden. We had a massive garden last year. See post here. We also got really into composting. See post here. Now that it’s March (though there is lots of snow on the ground still around here in the Metro area), I’m contemplating our garden for this spring and what will be in it. J has a little book on gardening that he likes to paw through and point & name his favorite garden items. You guessed them: blueberries, raspberries, and strawberries. Luckily we have all those in the ground already from last year. We also planted two apple trees for…
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Chop, Boil, Puree. That’s it. 1) Chop. My dad worked in a slaughter house for years to put himself through school. He still likes to answer his phone with phrases like “City Morgue. You stab ’em, we slab ’em.” Or, “You slice ’em, we dice ’em.” I don’t know that there’s a correlation between the former employment and the City Morgue (animals v. humans, not such a big stretch), but I always think of those phrases when I’m chopping a bunch of anything. As an aside, my dad will eat any meat product, despite the fact that he knows what nasty stuff goes into those no-brand hot dogs. Sigh. I worked with a bag of organic apples from the Coop, and just washed, sliced, and chopped them. You don’t have to go too small, but the smaller it is, the smaller the peels will be. I don’t peel the apples at this stage for J as he doesn’t seem to choke on the occasional peel piece. Younger kiddos, definitely peel them because no amount of blending or even ricing can completely get rid of the peel. 2) Boiling water. You can add the apples before or after the water boils. Whichever you prefer. Just go until the apples are soft. 3) Puree! I added a little bit of water from the stockpot to ease the softening. Usually I use a food mill (which produces better applesauce, in my opinion), but today was a Vitamix day. (I.e., easier.) 4) Serve! and…
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So we’re down to six weeks out, give or take a bit. It’s not a due date, right? It’s a “guess” date. They always say that in Blooma yoga classes (haven’t been? Hello?! prenatal support group, work out, and affirmation session!). And I like that. So instead of saying “I’m due April 16.” I say “I’m due sometime in April. My birthday is the 10th, AA’s is the 3rd, my brother’s is the 21st, so she could come and squash any of our birthdays 🙂 But truly, my beloved readers, how do the logistics of two children work? J is good about (and happy to) play by himself often. He thrives in our Montessori-esque set ups, with access to all sorts of exploratory toys, all his senses involved, etc. But what about when all 30 pounds of him needs to be hauled to time-out? What about when he screams “NO!” when I gently but firmly tell him it’s time to change his poopy diaper. (My sister should be laughing here because I’m certain our perfect goddaughter will be potty-trained by 20 months. See her post on Elimination Communication here :). What about when he needs help eating his soup? Thankfully babies are small, and wearable, and sleepy, and snuggly. Thankfully J is sweet, for the most part, and self-sufficient, as much as he can be at his age (his daddy has this whole teeth-brushing routine down with him that I’ll share later. So cute!). But two children? Any aged…
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This is part 7 of our Birth & Parenting Series. Part 1 (Thoughts From a Mother of Four) is here, part 2 (Mother of Seven Shares Her Empowering Birth Stories) is here, part 3 (First-Time Mother of Twins) is here, part 4 (How First-Time Parents Braved a Placental Abruption) is here, part 5 (Childbirth Collective Doula Film Premiere) is here, and part 6 (First-Time Mama Bravely Faces Transverse Baby & C-Section) is here. This mother of five chose homeschooling after a brief stint for her eldest daughter in traditional schooling. She shares how she got there, why she chose that as best for her family, and what they do during the day. It’s inspirational! What a family. She also runs the website Diapeepees about her young son with diabetes. See link here. She says she’s a novice, but she’s pushing pro in my world! Homeschooling: A Novice’s Perspective. Homeschooling. An idea that is simultaneously intriguing and intimidating to a young mother. As my daughter approached school age, I remember telling everyone we were heading in the homeschool direction. But at the last minute, I fell for a Catholic school girl uniform and sent her off to kindergarten. It was easier that way, quite a relief in fact. Homeschooling was a grand idea, but I had no idea how to actually implement it. Then we moved. The new Catholic school was expensive. I wasn’t sure I wanted my daughter in school anymore anyway. She was only on the verge of second grade then, but I was already worried…
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