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I love relaxing. I love thinking about it, planning it, dreaming it, but I don’t actually love doing it. In part because I’m constantly thwarted from pursing my side projects by the actual task of tending to and loving up and chastising my offspring. But in other part because I really want to do when I can. So if the moment arises to relax, I will probably huddle over my sewing machine or computer to write & edit instead. I know tomes are composed about the art of relaxation. I haven’t read any of them. But what I do know is that mamas need quick ways to rest and relax because you never know when the call will come from said offspring from the bowels of the bathroom MAMA I MADE A POOPY and off you go to the races again. Linking with Kelly and her better & cleverer writing friends! 1) Close your eyes and say I think I can I think I can. Just that little pep talk. It’s like attending a conference with motivational speakers without going anywhere. 2) Do you like your robe & slippers?? I finally landed on a combo I live in. Don’t judge. To have something you can retreat inside like a nuclear fall out shelter is pretty amazing. If you don’t like yours, keep looking. AA gave me a cotton robe similar to this for Christmas last year and Molly gave me these slippers. But I also love this robe. And these slippies. 3)…
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It was just one of the many many lessons I’ve learned from being a mother. Some of the most important parts of my job are to act with kindness and to own my ish. Today everything exploded this morning. Miscommunications, missed expectations, running late to a friend’s house, my oldest suddenly with us instead of having big boy time, the instagram charity auction for Zelie & Co bustling, and a bad night the night before. Cue me shouting and them all shouting and it’s 10 degrees and 20 below windchill and YES YOU MUST WEAR YOUR SNOWPANTS INTO THE CAR. By the time we were all loaded into the car, I felt it. That regretful feeling in my stomach. I’m the adult. I need to control my crabby temper. Just because my kids are being rude and not cooperating doesn’t give me license to let loose on them. I am the adult. And once again, I’ve proven that mothering, for me, is the quickest way to being a better person. Because instead of having control over my life, with minimalism well under way around the house, and days of creative output for me, and a well-balanced diet, and clothes that I enjoy wearing, I’m in the thick of real life with small kids. Our house is messy, our days are well worn with book reading and painting and hide & go-to-seek and naps, I’m eating pepperoni & melted cheese on tortilla chips, and I’m out of shape so my wardrobe is limited…
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The struggle of the young mom who is alone on her parenting journey is near and dear to my heart. I’ve partnered for a good cause with Heather from Mama Knows Honey Child and the artisan whimsical children’s products shop on testy called Honey Child Forest or on instragram, too, Honey Child Forest. She felts, makes amazing banners, hand lettered art, and so much more (including custom family portraits!). We met at the Edel conference in 2014 and I thought, this is my kind of girlfriend! Lately we’ve been working together over at the instagram popup weekly shop of many mama artisans called Zelie & Co. For the shop’s weekly sale tomorrow, we’re changing things up and doing an auction-style sale with ALL the proceeds going to charity! {My girlfriend Jenny is telling you about my gift set offering–leggings, bib, burp cloth, plush blanket–all organic!} My charity of choice is the Philomela House here in Saint Paul. They provide housing for homeless expecting mothers and the support they need along their journey. A friend’s mother (since deceased) founded it and we pray for those mamas every night! Heather’s offering a super sweet bunch of goods valued over $100!! Needlefelted heart garland – 3 feet long Needlefelted/embroidered wool felt fawn crown Totus Tuus felt flower and wood sign A rustic “Give Me Jesus” banner And two Fox and Gnome beeswax candles GET OVER THERE tomorrow and BID, friends!
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Somehow this last six months has felt like a shift in our family. SuperBoy isn’t a little kid anymore. He’s in a whole different place, so I’m in a whole different place as a mom. Yes, he still has epic clashes with me and trouble listening at times, but his maturity is sometimes (sometimes) amazing. His wings are growing. Banging. Bashing around, looking for higher heights to leap from, and leading the way for the little kids to want and be and do more and more. Case in point. The other day, for the first time in months, SuperBoy was the gentle big brother I know is in there somewhere. He changed into his play clothes in the morning without a fight. He let his sister play with his legos without apoplectic screeches. He spoke in the cutest LOUD SLOW BABY TALK to the toddler who understood him perfectly and let us know with lots of “BABA” and “JEE-JEE” responses. {that’s my dad’s name and Jesus, FYI}. His idea for Lent? Offering up all treats and adding in doing all his morning chores before breakfast. WHO IS THIS KID? I thought about these posts I had written throughout the years: big boy battles, taming your toddler’s tantrums, feeling powerless with your preschooler, power parenting: why force & fear don’t work, helping emotional boy find his voice & ears. He’s growing up. That’s my dad’s dresser from his childhood we’ve repainted around those 50’s decals a few times for our babes. …
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My friend Shannon is a Brooklyn mama of two, and an amazing designer. She and her husband launched this gorgeous line called Natti Natti which means nighty night in Swedish. It’s organic, hand designed, and so soft. She was kind enough to send over this. And we swooned. And swooned hard. She has designed pocket duvets, regular duvets, pillows, blankets, and art prints. Her home in Brooklyn is one where you never want to leave because every wall has something thoughtful and interesting on it, but in a simple, clean, modern Swedish style so it’s not overwhelming. My daughter will not stop. She will not relent. She is in love with her duvet. To her core. Even though it was for her baby brother’s toddler bed! She’s hiding the special pillow. Because . . ?? When we switch the kids’ rooms up this summer and hopefully the boys are happy in one room and she’s happily established in her own palatial girl room (requests for her wall paint have ranged from gold stars to purple polka dots to wallpaper of dogs–we’ll probably go less exciting), I am getting this or maybe this for her big girl bed. Her teddy (my old teddy) desperately needed this bread stuffed into his pocket on the duvet, just in case he needed late night toast. Clearly, he’s hungry. If you have a babe moving into toddlerhood, you probably need this snuggler for him or her. Or if you need to swaddle, skip on over for this because my…
Read MoreLast week I had one of my best days of my life. Yes, the morning was littered with tantrums from everyone, but I didn’t mind. I welcomed the learning opportunity for all of us. My oldest was angry that life isn’t fair and that he doesn’t get to do what he wants all the time (totally feel you, buddy). My middle was angry that I couldn’t spend the morning with her alone in her room (yup). My tot was angry because people didn’t like him biting them. But, truly, the day was peaceful because I was peaceful. The other night my husband described what’s been going on for him with his case files lately (response briefs! motions for summary judgment! The stuff that only another lawyer could love) and I recoiled inside. Oh My Gosh my day is so easy. My kids crying? Fine. My kids not listening? To be expected. I don’t get dressed or clean the house? No one cares. I don’t have deadlines and clients and billable hours to worry about. I have playdates, nature hikes, and baking muffins. The only thing expected of me is to be kind. And that’s what I’m expecting of myself. That’s my standard from now on. Kitchen not cleaned up? I’m not going to let it rattle my slightly semi type-A personality. Toy room trashed? So what. I’ll tidy up later. My hair looks like a bad ombre. That’s fine. I really don’t care and will get it colored in a few weeks. (Cue…
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