Kidding
I’m an advocate of co-sleeping. Big time. But for us, that means, when the baby is little. So as SweetPea is almost 6 months, I’m ready to have her start and end her night in her own room. Developmentally is this healthiest for her? The studies point both way, but to be safe, I’ll say she benefits greatly from sleeping by us. Trouble is, I’m not sure I can take any more all-night-looking-to-nurse-but-don’t-really-have-to-maybe-I-will-thank-you-very-kindly sessions. Night nursing? Absolutely. I’ll get up twice a night if necessary. Why? Because she nurses on demand during the day so sometimes that may mean she doesn’t get enough. And why else? Oh, yes, because breastfeeding during the night is an almost sure-fire way to keep your menstrual cycle from coming back. But sharing a bed all night long, I think it’s time. So we are doing it gradually. I find two steps are necessary to ease a co-sleeper out into the wild of their own space. We’re not through with the transition yet (case in point, she came back to our bed at 11pm last night because she awakened 4 times in 3 hours with a stuffy nose, crying). 1) From the bed to NEAR the bed. Wait as long as possible. Keep your child in the room as long as possible. Babies sleep better near their mamas. PLEASE don’t put a newborn in a different room! So much harder for him. So much harder to respond to his instantaneous needs. Start baby in your…
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or how to survive letting your child move from a crib to a bed. SuperBoy is 2 years, 3 months and we’ve made the big move. Only for night sleep, not naps, but still. It’s a massive adjustment. Here’s how we did and what’s working so far. (Pictured here on the quilt I’m almost done with for my brother & new sister-in-law!) 1) Choosing a floor bed over a toddler or an elevated bed. We opted for a mattress/box spring combined double bed. It sits happily on the floor. This way, there’s no concern about SuperBoy launching himself out of bed in the middle of a crazed dream and smashing his head. The flipside is that he can more easily get out of bed than if he were in an elevated bed with a guard rail. I don’t understand toddler beds. I guess it’s a novelty thing and a training step for a real bed for the child. It seems like a waste of money, but maybe I’m missing something profound. 2) Setting up rules that are feasible. The child, in my opinion, has to be old enough to understand the rules, and the rules have to be suitable for the child’s ability to comprehend them. We have one rule: you can’t get out of bed at night or you have to go into your crib. He repeats it back to me before he goes to sleep. Does he get up and play in his dark room? I don’t think…
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So you have this little beautiful baby, right? And she just looks at you and coos, or maybe she screams a lot. Maybe she just sleeps and makes diapers, with the occasional desperate nursing session. What sorts of developmental things should you be doing to ensure your child is the next Einstein? Or Edith Stein? I’m no doctor, nor a child developmental specialist, but I am a thinking, reading, interested mother of two who’s knows what has shaped her bright children (of course they’re bright!). 1) Massage. Infant massage. Touch & talk combined. Double check. Think of it like grooming a horse. You get to know all the creaks and cracks and where the bumps are. This gives you an advantage when something new crops up. You notice it. Every night after bathtime, or every afternoon before naptime, or every morning after breakfast, find a cosy nest and give your baby a massage. Make eye contact. Sing or talk. Rub all parts of your babe’s body. Use a light oil like grapeseed, or an actual infant massage oil like Do Good Naturals (loooove their product line). Check out any book or video online. It’s hard to do wrong. Just rub their little muscles, and love them up. Simple and crucial. 2) Read and talk. I’ve written quite a bit on reading to small children and how it effects their behavior and brain growth, here {Introduce Reading Early: Bring on the Books}, and here {Teaching Your Child Numbers and Letters} and…
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How’s your toddler treating you? Starting around 14 months or so, when children start to individuate from their mothers, and stretch their little wings, look out, parents, tantrums are on the horizon. I’ve written about tantrums since SuperBoy was around 14 months. I have an entire section of this site devoted to Toddler Behavior, mostly because I find it perplexing and fascinating all at once. I’ve written about everything from Teaching Toddler Independence & Toothbrushing to Tantrums Abound . . . HELP! and so much more in between. SuperBoy is just over 2 years old now, and if you have a child around that age, and are struggling with dealing with the constant meltdowns and tantrums, here’s our 3 step method that may help you, too. 1) Tantrum sparks. You begin your mantra. SuperBoy takes my hairbrush and bangs it repeatedly on the side of the bathtub while awaiting his turn for a bath. I ask him politely not to do that. He stops. He starts again a few moments later. I remind him. He pauses, then resumes. I ask him to hand me the brush (he refuses) so I remove it from his hands calmly while he begins to melt. I note, “I asked you nicely to stop. You didn’t listen to mama. You chose to lose the hairbrush.” He cries and screams for it back. I stay calm and ignore his behavior, but repeat my iteration of what happened so he gets an idea of the sequence of events.…
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I only have two kiddos, right? And one of them can just barely roll over, so I’m a pretty benign baby-household neighbor. And they’re cute, right? Sorta feral looking, but cute. Still, I’m guilty of several of the following indicators that my neighbors live next door to someone with children: 1) You think a feral cat is being attacked by coyotes but it’s the baby protesting (insert any plethora of things here). 2) You feel like you live near a nudist colony but really it’s just that the kids are constantly protesting clothing during the summer, or are mid-clothing change, or are potty training, or are getting their daily vitamin D dosage. SuperBoy was streaking up & down the driveway tonight after running through the sprinkler with his Dada. The neighbors were totally looking (aghast?). 3) You believe there’s a perpetual garage sale of plastic toys transpiring but really it’s just all the stuff that your neighbors just acquired at a garage sale that is now the eye sore of the neighborhood. 4) You hear the same screaming toddler perform the same screams every night no, he’s not auditioning for the local opera company, he’s expressing his feelings about coming indoors and being separated from his precious baseball paraphernalia. 5) Anytime you need to borrow whole yogurt or milk, prefold diapers, or matchbox cars, you know to come to my house because we should own stock in Stonyfield Yogurt (despite my attempts at making my own {Yogurt Challenge}) and Horizon…
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My sister has been here for a week with her adorable baby girl V who is just about 1 year old. SuperBoy and SweetPea are so lucky to have a cousin! It’s been wonderful for many reasons, but most fascinating has been watching the two older children interact, and then also watching SweetPea watch them. It’s layers upon layers of learning. Most keenly I think SuperBoy has influenced V’s language and coordination. She’s added a few words to her vocab, complete with what appears to be a real understanding about what those words correspond to. He’s a real talker at 25 months, full discernible sentences and a highly developed vocab. She says “babeh” and “dahh” for baby and dog now! And she’s really a “cruiser” now, and took two whole steps together toward SuperBoy. Her first two steps! He seems to like crawling toward her and then getting up and running away, to see if she’ll follow suit. Almost, buddy! How amazing to learn from one another, and to learn good things, that is, as many a germ & bad habit have been passed from kid to kid. We all loved watching them watch each other, and celebrating my brother & his fiance’s forthcoming wedding, and just all being together. Family is so precious. Our precious niece, V. SuperBoy insisted on wearing his dad’s purple tie over his own. So yes, he is wearing two ties in this photo. It was that kind of party. SweetPea living it up in…
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