Mombard: bombarding new moms with advice
Not that I’ve ever done this: mombard someone? Are you guilty of it? You read every book published about pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, attachment parenting, vaccines, homemade organic baby food, cloth diapers, cosleeping, and maybe even elimination communication for when you don’t want to use your cloth diapers, and now you’re the pro. The expert. The one dispensing advice.
You know you’ve mombarded someone if the following is familiar. And oh-my-gosh, we are all so self righteous and judgmental of other moms!
Scenario number 1:
Friend says: Oh, I’m just exhausted. This newborn is keeping me up all night.
You think: She’s a new mom. She doesn’t know about night nursing. She doesn’t know about absorbent cloth night diapers. She doesn’t know about baby led sleeping (aka no sleep but nursing all night). She doesn’t know that if she just nurses and cosleeps her monster will be come an angel. I know everything because I’m a mom of multiple.
You say: “Oh, it’s so hard. But really it only gets easier if you nurse all night and cosleep.”
Friend thinks: Jerk.
Scenario number 2:
Friend says: “Oh, baby food is so expensive. And I’m back to work so it’s too hard to make. I’m exhausted.”
You think: She’s a working mom. She should schedule making all her baby food on the weekends. She should also buy only organic products, preferably from the farmer’s market, so even if they’re not certified, they’re local. Carbon footprint et al. She should get those cute mason jars that are baby sized. Where did I see that pin on pinterest about jarring your homemade organic baby food in a fashionable way? I should send that to her as a hint. I made all my baby food, fashionably.
You say: “Oh, well, extended nursing helps cut into their food consumption, and really Earth’s Best brand is the best if you can’t make your own food. If you do opt for it, I have a great cookbook and can send you this pin about really cute mason jars to put it in.”
Friend thinks: Baby sized mason jars?!?!
I may be guilty of having bombarded a girlfriend unintentionally the other day. I caught myself and thought, what a jerk. And actually, the more kids I have the more I appreciate all styles of parenting. And that you should just listen with empathy to your girlfriend and think, yes, it is hard, whatever “it” is.