momsplaining

Are you prone to this as well? Oh, you probably exercise extreme self-control and moderate all expectations to a nice flat do-able level. So I’ll just share how I have blown each Mother’s Day (there have been 6!) up until now. Mind Reader. My husband had better read my mind and know exactly what I want even though I don’t want to say it aloud because it sounds selfish: LEAVE ME ALONE AND BRING ME DESSERT FOR BREAKFAST AND I DON’T WANT TO DO ANYTHING EVER ALL DAY LONG. So when he has hung to what I actually said demurely (oh, lovie, whatever! I just want to enjoy you and the kids!), I seethe inside. Doesn’t he know this hallmark holiday is supposed to alleviate all feelings of mama-frustration? Doesn’t he know I want a break so desperately that I would eschew all the cards and cake for a good long sleep? Doesn’t he know??? Gifts. Oh, you read that right. P L U R A L. I would love something over the top and impulsive and romantic and planned and wrapped and specific to my latest pinterests and instagrams. Budget what? Kid art–so nice, but I thought this was about my husband lavishing me with the world’s best mother gift. He could actually have that engraved on a silver spoon from which I gobbled up my yogurt parfait (bfast in bed for the win–see #1). Or he could have it embroidered onto a pillow from which I could never rise…